Oh Boy Oh Boy. Or Oh Boy Oh Girl. Or Oh Girl Oh Girl.

Wow. That's the polite version of what I've been repeating all day. The other version starts with Holy. Or, as my husband has been saying as code for, I can't believe we're pregnant, Oh Boy.

So I had my 8 week ultrasound today. At first, I followed the nurse without my husband. Something made me ask her if he could be there - and she said yes. So I went back out and got him. Thank God I did.

Almost immediately after inserting the "wand" (very polite term), the nurse asked, "How many transfers did you have?"

I knew that was a bad sign.

I said, "I didn't have IVF. I had an IUI."

Then she said, "Well, take a look at your two babies. "

I started crying. I honestly couldn't - and still can't really - believe it. But there they were. Both of them.

Little hearts beating like crazy and side by side, like they were looking at each other.

I know I should be just happy - overjoyed - I'll get a complete family (if everything goes okay) all at once. And I am happy - but I'm also terrified.

What if they aren't okay? What if they're born too early? What if I get so enormous my stomach never recovers? What if my back (which is already very bad) can't handle the weight and strain? How will we afford two cribs, two high chairs, double amounts of everything? A bigger house?

To make it short, I'm freaking out.

The doctor told me that with my number of follicles - just three - he had only seen twins once or twice in twenty five years. As usual, I seem to be in that crazy 1%.

My husband was great about it - he was calm, excited and supportive - trying to hug and kiss me in the waiting room (I didn't want to talk about it in front of all the couples I knew could be finding out that yet another IVF cycle had failed) and asked for scissors so he could cut off the best ultrasound picture of "babies A and B" to keep in his wallet.

My sister was also amazing - she was incredibly happy and pointed out all the great things her friends with twins have told her (built-in playmate, only having to be pregnant once, getting sleep deprivation over all at once, learning to share from the start....).

But still, I'm really nervous. I read that I need to eat more - I feel like it's been a struggle to eat as much as I'm already eating (I'm nauseous and exhausted all the time, and I guess that makes sense now). I was planning to try to gain only about 15-20 pounds, because I'm already overweight, but that's off the table now.

Wow. Or, as my husband has started saying, wow wow.

Wow...WOW!